Poison Ivy needs to die. Every single specimen of this evil, evil plant needs to wither up and return to whichever layer of Hell it spawned from. The United Nations needs to create a unique task force of highly educated, specially trained combat veterans to traverse the globe with chemically-enhanced, military grade Weed-B-Gone, and erase this nightmarish abomination from existence. Also: I do not like poison ivy.
Ever since I was a young, naive little boy I have been severely allergic to the plant’s signature urushiol oil. Severely allergic. It seems that not a summer has gone by that I haven’t suffered the wrath of this diabolical menace. I wouldn’t develop a simple rash, mind you, I would develop immensely irritating, pus filled blisters on every surface of my body. If I were to say that I had to peel layers of crusted yellow puss off of itchy, oozing sores on my skin… I would be giving you the PG version of my experiences with this so called ‘plant’.