Wild Turkeys Assail Postmen

Madison, Wisconsin. Postmen have been under assault in recent months from a raving band of turkeys, who have taken it upon themselves to peck at and spur the town’s mail carriers, even going so far as to enter their mail trucks and strike the driver.

Image from banjoelknap on Flickr

The turkeys, obviously making the most rudimentary efforts to cut off the citizens of Madison from the outside world before having a “twisted, backwards, Thanksgiving feast of their own” are expected to continue this behavior up to the middle of May. At that point, the expectation is that the breeding season will expire, and the amount of hormones cruising through their turkey veins will return to a more normal level.

Why postal workers, you may ask? Apparently color plays an important role in turkey breeding, and the birds have been, er, aroused by the red, white, and blue of the postal trucks and uniforms of the employees.

The postal workers themselves are simply counting the days until the end of the season. They were first armed with water pistols, and are now carrying large sticks. With any luck, this race of arms and hormones will come to an end before somebody gets embarrassed.