Grab a few ingredients, follow the recipe, stick it in the oven and have a nice glass of wine while you wait for your masterpiece to bake. Well, try telling someone who’s good at baking that it’s all so straightforward and see if you get a spatula to the face. Even better, try telling the creators of these disastrous delicacies how easy baking is. Because one thing is for sure – even if you closely follow the recipe, things don’t always quite work out as planned. Take the above attempt at baking bird bread, for example…
D’awww, look at the chubby little birdies with their sweetcorn beaks. They’re going to look so adorable when they… OH GOD! KILL IT! KILL THE MANY FACED BIRD BLOB! PUT IT OUT OF ITS MISERY BEFORE THE FACES BEGIN DEVOURING EACH OTHER!
This haunting, pulverized monkey is somehow still smiling through the pain. His inverted eyes, seeping black blood and melted ears aren’t really the kind of vision you’d want your one year old to catch sight of. Unless you really didn’t want them to forget their first birthday. Like, ever.
OK guys, we need to rally together. Remember how in Hook, Tinkerbell taught us that clapping your hands can bring a fairy back to life? We’re going to need a standing ovation for this one.
Imagine putting a hotdog in this bread dog and feeding it to Snoop Dogg. Whoever made the dog mess on the left was probably distracted by the exact same magnificent thought.
“Whenever you feel like criticizing anyone, just remember that all the people in this world haven’t had the advantages that you’ve had.” – F. Scott Fitzgerald, The Great Gatsby. Cake still looks pretty bad though, yeah?
Instead of a pot of gold at the end of these melted rainbows, there’s a pot of golden cheese. But the cheese has also deformed beyond the point of being edible, so I wouldn’t bother with any of it really.
This looks like someone had a fever dream about SpongeBob. And then had to immediately create an expressionist rendition out of anything they could find lying around the house. Say hello to SpongeBob Spare-parts.
To be fair to this poor baker, the picture on the left looks almost impossible to re-create unless you’re a master of the craft. Saying that, it is NOT okay to just stick your teddy under a chocolate fountain and pretend it’s a cake.
“Let it go… let it go-o! Can’t hold it back any more!” Seriously let it go back to the wild. It needs to feed. Never speak of what you saw.
Whenever you think of the “cookie monster” you always think of the cute little fur-ball who loves cookies, right? Well, now you will forever think of actual monster cookies that stare into your soul. You’re welcome.
Poor Ariel. She looks like someone took her face and slammed it into Flounder, Sebastian and Prince Eric’s faces over and over until she resembled this monstrosity. But she seems happy, despite all of the hatred that has obviously been baked into her.
This biscuit may not have ended up quite as festive as expected. However, in an odd stroke of baking luck, she has managed to create Slimer from Ghostbusters. We’d chalk that up as a win.
Her: “Hey, honey! Did you make those cute little Rice Krispie pumpkins we saw for the trick or treaters? I don’t want to get caught short again, like last year.”
Him: “I have good news and bad news…”
This one was actually turning out quite well until it baked for half an hour too long. And, for some reason, it then just fully turned inside out. Our question is: why is it wearing a potato chip packet as a hat?
Baking instructions: Take a small pan and invert it. Grab a huge jar of mustard. Take off your shoe and put it on the table. Put the pan on the shoe. Pour mustard all over it. Draw an evil little eye. Don’t bother baking.
“Now, repeat after me, my apprentice: I am the great and powerful Cthulhu! Nightmare of the underworld! I will destroy all who oppose me!”
“I am va greath and powaphul Cfuru! Nifemare off va underworlfd! I willth deftroy all who opphose me!”
“We’ll work on it.”
I mean, in for a penny, in for a pound. If your creation is this much of a fail when it comes out of the oven, then why not add some novelty teeth to finish it off? At least someone (or something) is smiling.
Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer, had a very shiny nose!
Randolph the blue-nosed blob-fish didn’t care about Rudolph’s problems. He had enough problems of his own. Now Randolph simply waits until the day someone eats him out of pity.
What were the ingredients in this thing? Ginger, flour, butter, eggs and anabolic steroids? I’ve heard that working out in a hot environment is great for muscle stimulation but this is ridiculous.
“I don’t get it… I pretty much followed the recipe.”
“What did you do differently?”
“I added a few watermelons for flavor”
“Yeah, that might explain the moisture. I like it, though. You gonna eat that?”