Peggy Lee’s Split With Dave Barbour Is Sadder Than They Both Let On

The 1940s, which is when Lee and Barbour started dating, was a decade marked by some great cultural changes. While certainly not as huge as some other celebrity couples, we could say they’re one of the earliest that we remember. That’s quite an achievement, considering how the “famous couples” trend is still very much relevant today.

Lee and Barbour’s story all comes down to the music. In fact, their history together started when Lee was a new addition to Benny Goodman’s band. Although Lee was only 21 years old when she joined in 1941, her work was of great importance to her. It changed her life completely.

Not long after Lee joined Goodman, guitarist Dave Barbour was also hired into the band. These were the years when guitar playing was being developed, but Barbour was a real jazz pro. In fact, he was so good that he was the only man in the band to really impress Lee. She just couldn’t resist his musicianship.

Lee stayed two years in Benny Goodman’s band. But she left the group after Barbour was fired, which happened due to a strict don’t-date-a-female-singer policy Goodman enforced within his band. There was no bad blood between any of them, though. Lee just didn’t feel like staying there and sticking with her career rather than her husband.

But as if this wasn’t enough, after leaving the band together with Barbour, Lee planned on quitting the music business altogether. Her plan, at the time, was to be a housewife and dedicate her time and energy to raising a family. However, it was Barbour himself who persuaded her not to do that. After all, they both were incredibly talented musicians.

All this might prove the theory that people can’t be restrained and they do whatever’s forbidden. But all jokes aside, their love was honest. As she revealed in a 1984 interview with Jazz Professional, “I tried to retire when we got married, but it didn’t work.” She added, “He said that later I might resent not having used the talent I’d been given.”

Barbour’s support showed true love based on respect. He obviously didn’t want to hold her back and was very supportive of her talents. And, of course, her talent wasn’t unnoticed by the people in the industry. She kept getting offers and she kept turning them down. Even though the money on the table was great for the era, she didn’t want to hear it.

Fortunately, Lee never gave up on her singing and showmanship. Even after so many declines, she kept getting more offers and eventually seized some of them. In 1944 she got back into writing and some recording sessions here and there. The pair also wrote a bunch of incredible songs, making great commercial success together. They seemed like a perfect pair.

Juggling marriage, love, and professional careers is far from a simple task, but things just seemed to work so well between them. For an avid collector of the “oldies” music, incidentally, a posthumous release entitled A Musical Marriage is worth checking out. Nothing speaks about love so well as the art that two can create together.

Of course, we don’t want you to think of Lee and Barbour as these two working drones. In November 1943 they got their first and only child in Nicki Lee Barbour. Later on, she became known as Nicki Lee Barbour Foster. She hasn’t followed her parents’ musical path, although she did become a successful businesswoman. She passed away in 2014, at the age of 71.

So, there was now a trio instead of just a duo. While Nicki hadn’t become a famous musician, she clearly was fond of music. After all, her mother was enjoying some incredible success, all due to her incredible musicianship. Barbour also wrote a piece for their daughter titled “Forever Nicki.” Music was always around the house, and Lee used “Soliloquy” from the Carousel musical to put her to sleep.

As we all know by now, celebrity lives get blown out of proportion. Nothing is ever that perfect. And if it seems like it is, it’s usually far from it. And that was kind of the case with Peggy Lee and Dave Barbour. All of the magazine interviews and photographs showcasing their lavish lifestyle and perfect marriage were just a façade.

Barbour wanted the best for Lee. He also had his own work apart from hers, but she was the super-famous one at the time. He wanted to continue her musical career, but it was her success and their way of dealing with it that drove them apart in the end.

The problem was that Barbour had trouble dealing with Lee’s fame. Which is kind of ironic, considering he was the one who wanted her to be successful. Be that as it may, he wasn’t really taking the whole thing well. It’s hard to say whether she changed or whether he was envious of her and just couldn’t handle it.

Things were building up inside of him — and he found a solution at the bottom of every bottle. This, obviously, caused serious harm to their relationship, and they just kept fighting and fighting. A union that initially seemed perfect just wasn’t working out anymore. All the great music and their shared sense of humor slowly faded away, as Barbour kept fighting his demons with alcohol.

You already know where this is going. What’s somewhat unexpected, however, is that Barbour was the one who made the decision to break it off, which was actually honest and fair. Barbour didn’t want to ruin the lives of his wife and daughter. If he couldn’t deal with Lee’s life and success, then he felt he should move on. So, he did and the couple divorced in 1951.

As difficult as it may have seemed at the time, and as typical as it may sound to say, it was for the best. Even though Barbour’s feelings put a strain on a relationship, you gotta give credit to him. After all, it takes guts to break off a relationship and admit you’re the one who’s causing the problems.

Nonetheless, the two of them still loved and respected each other. As weird as it may sound, his decision to divorce Lee was out of pure love for her and Nicki. Even many years after their marriage ended, they still talked to each other. They kept in touch on and off over the years, which was also important for raising their daughter.

The most depressing, yet sobering, part of every breakup is learning that feelings aren’t enough. Things sometimes just don’t work out between people. And these are usually the saddest ones to end. Going to Barbour’s final days on this planet, he told Lee that he thought about marrying her again and finally making it work. For better or for worse, this never happened.

No matter how awful and grim things may seem after a breakup or a divorce, people move on. And so did Lee. But first and foremost, she focused on her career. In fact, being 31 years old at the time of the divorce, things were just starting out for her. And she went on to release countless albums and write hundreds of songs over the coming decades.

But aside from her professional pursuits, Lee also moved on romantically. It was about two years after her divorce from Barbour that she got married to actor Brad Dexter. But Hollywood’s famous “tough guy” wasn’t the best choice for Lee — it took about eight months for the marriage to end. They tied the knot in 1953 and divorced later that same year. There’s not much information about this relationship, although we can safely assume it wasn’t a good one.

After a few years, Lee eventually married another actor, Dewey Martin, in 1956. This was yet another short-lived union, although this time it lasted about two years. As a brief report on June 14, 1959, edition of Times Daily says, it’s Lee who requested the divorce, claiming that Martin “was jealous, used vile language, and tried to upset her before singing engagements.”

As it usually goes with celebrity couples, there were some internal fights that the public never knew about. Other musicians confirmed that things weren’t all peachy in their home. As revealed on Lee’s official website, Dewey didn’t like her friends. Apparently, “he was rude to them.” Well, good riddance, we say.

Although not much is known of Peggy Lee’s dating life, we know she was married a fourth time as well. She began dating percussionist and bandleader Jack Del Rio in 1963. They dated for about a year, before getting married in early 1964. However, their marriage lasted only ten months, breaking off the same year they married. This was the last time she ever wed.

While talking about all of Lee’s marriages, one can’t help but wonder what happened with Barbour. While he mostly led a low-profile life out of the public eye, it’s known that he still had troubles with alcohol in the coming years. It was only in the final years of his life that he managed to stay clear of it.

No matter what we may say, we all remember our first loves. But for both Lee and Barbour, it was more than just a random fond memory of a former relationship. The plans they had to remarry were actually pretty serious. Even many years after Barbour’s passing, she would get all nostalgic and speak very fondly of him.

On December 11, 1965, Dave Barbour passed away, aged 53, due to complications with a hemorrhaged ulcer. He and Lee, it seems, loved each other until the very end, but they never got the chance to renew their vows and start all over again. Not even for a year or two.

Of course, there are a lot of things we’re missing from the story. They kept most of their relationship private and away from the public eye. But one thing is certain: Lee and Barbour were in love. And although their story had a sad ending, they still serve as an example of true dedication and respect between two lovers. Yet not everyone showed Lee the respect she deserved.

Yes, it turns out that Kermit the Frog’s on/off girlfriend, Miss Piggy, is actually based on Peggy Lee. But the lady who once voiced two Siamese cats and a Pekingese in Lady and the Tramp reportedly didn’t appreciate being honored by a felt puppet pig – let alone the brash diva who once took her name.

The Miss Piggy and Peggy Lee connection was initially deemed by many to be nothing more than an enduring urban legend. But it’s entirely true, as Bonnie Erickson, a designer on the Muppets, once revealed in an interview with Smithsonian. In fact, Miss Piggy was initially named Piggy Lee.

Erickson explained, “My mother used to live in North Dakota where Peggy Lee sang on the local radio station before she became a famous jazz singer. I first called the puppet Miss Piggy Lee – as a joke and an homage.” Yet Erickson didn’t bank on the character taking on a life of her own.

A toned-down version of Miss Piggy made her TV debut on a TV special hosted by Herb Alpert in October 1974. And during the show, she joined the jazz saxophonist for a rendition of “I Can’t Give You Anything but Love.” The porcine diva ultimately became a much bolder character, however, after The Muppet Show began airing two years later.

Surprisingly, Miss Piggy was restricted to being a chorus pig during the show’s early stages. As the writers began to acknowledge her star quality, though, she was upgraded to major cast member status. And alongside her on/off love interest Kermit the Frog, Miss Piggy soon became one of the main faces of the Muppets brand.

Miss Piggy was called Piggy Lee in the sixth episode of The Muppet Show’s first season. Later in the run, the character also informs celebrated comedian Avery Schreiber that Piggy is simply a shorter form of the name Pigathius. But as Miss Piggy’s popularity increased, the behind-the-scenes team began to worry that her name was a mistake.

Erickson told Smithsonian, “Peggy Lee was a very independent woman, and Piggy certainly is the same. But as Piggy’s fame began to grow, nobody wanted to upset Peggy Lee – especially because we admired her work. So the Muppet’s name was shortened to Miss Piggy.” And the rest, as they say, is history.

Undoubtedly, Erickson’s decision was a wise one, too. After all, Lee certainly wasn’t averse to getting the courts involved if she felt wronged. In 1991, for example, she sued the Walt Disney Company for violating her Lady and the Tramp contract – following which she walked away with a cool $3.83 million.

To bolster her case, Lee had argued that Disney had issued the classic animation on VHS without her consent. The 1952 contract that she had for the film had stated, you see, that she had the right to give the nod to any “transcriptions for sale to the public.” And while video cassettes may not have existed at the time that Lee signed on the dotted line, the court deemed the Lady and the Tramp VHS copies to be pertinent to the Disney agreement.

Inevitably, Lee was delighted with the outcome, and in 1991 she told Entertainment Weekly, “I’m surprised I feel as good as I do. I guess when you’re a winner, you feel good. Disney has certainly made a fortune. I should think they’d be willing to share, but I guess mice need a lot of cheese.”

Meanwhile, Erickson discussed Miss Piggy’s unlikely namesake while speaking at a panel event named The Women of the Muppets in 2018. The designer was joined by Sonia Manzano, a.k.a. Sesame Street’s Maria, and puppeteer Fran Brill at the Center for Puppetry Arts in Atlanta. And she was keen to point out that Miss Piggy also had a much more natural inspiration.

“A lot of people have asked who I based Miss Piggy on, but it wasn’t a person,” Erickson told the audience. “She was based on my recollections of the pigs on my uncle’s farm in Minnesota where I spent summers as a child.” And Erickson went on to tell the story of how her mother’s favorite singer had served as an influence when it had come to naming the character.

Yet Erickson also revealed that it hadn’t been her decision alone to change Miss Piggy’s name to something a little more respectful to Lee. She told the panel, “Eventually, when we started to use Miss Piggy a little more, the legal department decided her name might not be considered a compliment. And it was shortened to Miss Piggy.”

The designer explained, “If you look back to the early days of The Muppet Show, you will see that [Miss Piggy] started out relatively simple. She was just a chorus girl who wore her chorus girl outfits. But she graduated – thanks to Frank Oz, who really developed her personality and gave her a reason to be – from the karate chop to the comedic hair.”

When asked whether she considered Miss Piggy a feminist, however, Erickson replied, “Isn’t it interesting? She’s done by a male performer, and yet she has become a symbol for sort of brassiness and independence that women appreciate. I would hesitate to say that she’s a feminist, because I’m not sure that that’s how Miss Piggy would feel about it or read it, but I see her as that. I think a lot of women feel the same way.”

Thankfully, Erickson and co appeared to get away with their tribute. And while speaking to Smithsonian, the Muppet designer admitted that she had no idea whether Lee knew she had inspired Miss Piggy. However, there have been rumors that the singer once warned that she would sue if the character’s name wasn’t changed.

Yet the connection between Peggy Lee and the Muppets doesn’t end with the name. In the fifth episode of The Muppet Show’s first season, a guest performer joins Animal and Floyd for a rendition of “Fever.” This, of course, was the track that Peggy Lee made famous way back in 1958.

And in a neat nod to her origins, none other than Miss Piggy performed the same track in summer 2006 at the Hollywood Bowl. The Muppet sported a red gown as she sat and then plummeted off a grand piano while belting out the classic hit. Miss Piggy joined Statler and Waldorf and her beloved Kermit the Frog at the event that honored the Hollywood Bowl Orchestra’s founding director John Mauceri.