Prince Harry Reveals How His Trauma Compelled Him To Turn His Life Around

During a personal interview in 2021, Prince Harry revealed how it really felt to grow up in a royal household. Now 37 years old, Harry still reels from the stress that he suffered as a boy, describing his childhood as “a mix between ‘the Truman Show’ and being in a zoo.” But this pressure would only prepare him for what was to come.

Even when the media was not hounding his family, Harry experienced a troubled home life. He suggested, "I’ve experienced some form of pain or suffering because of the pain or suffering that perhaps my father or my parents had suffered." But sometimes, any form of a parent-child relationship was better than none at all, as the prince would soon learn.

While Harry was still a young child, his parents, Charles and Diana, endured a turbulent relationship marred by extramarital affairs. These hurdles led to the couple separating in 1992, and in 1996, they finalized their divorce. But that wasn't the end of Harry's troubled home life.

A year after the divorce, Harry's mother Princess Diana was in Paris with her new boyfriend, Egyptian filmmaker Dodi Al-Fayed. After being constantly harassed by fans and the press, the couple made a quick getaway. In an effort to escape, the couple's driver, Henri Paul, took the couple on a high-speed getaway — one that would be their last car ride.

As the Mercedes limousine raced to Al-Fayed's apartment, it collided with the 13th pillar of the Pont d’Alma Bridge. While Al-Fayed and Paul died at the scene, Princess Diana held on for a few hours before passing away in hospital. Naturally, Prince Harry and his brother William entered a depression like they had never experienced before.

Having admitted to suffering several breakdowns following his mother's death, Harry coped with his pain by turning to his rebellious side, earning a reputation as the "party prince." And as the young royal became the center of a whole host of controversies, he realized he had to turn his life around.

In 2004, Prince Harry stepped forward and decided to serve in the army. After passing his Regular Commissions Board, Harry began training at The Royal Military Academy Sandhurst, becoming an Officer Cadet in the process. Soon enough, Harry would achieve a most remarkable feat.

On February 28, 2008, the British Minister of Defence made an announcement that shocked the nation. For over two months, the broader public had no idea that Prince Harry had been serving with the British Army in Helmand, Afghanistan. What's more, Harry was promoted to the rank of Lieutenant in April that year. But that wasn't the end of his heroism.

In September 2012, Harry returned to serve in Afghanistan, only this time as an Apache helicopter pilot. Soon enough, the prince would become an Apache commander. But while his time on the battlefield was nothing short of life-changing, it was an experience outside of the action that forever altered his path.

In 2013, Prince Harry attended the Warrior Games — a sports competition for wounded servicemen and servicewomen organized by the U.S. Department of Defense. Harry was deeply taken aback by the camaraderie that he witnessed there, and this rush of emotions inspired him to give back in his own way.

In his own words, Harry stated that he "stole" the concept of the Warrior Games and brought it to the U.K. by establishing the Invictus Games in 2014. According to the Invictus Games' official website, Harry "saw how the power of sport could help physically, psychologically, and socially." This event would soon grow to become Prince Harry's crowning achievement.

Many people wondered where the name for the competition came from. Harry explained that he drew inspiration from a poem called "Invictus" by William Ernest Henley, who was an amputee himself. As stated on the Games' website, "It embodies the fighting spirit of the wounded, injured and sick service personnel and what these tenacious men and women can achieve, post-injury." All that was left was to get things started.

In 2014, the inaugural Invictus Games took place in London. Countries from all over the world took part, including Afghanistan, France, Italy, New Zealand, the USA, and of course, the UK. Taking place every two years, Prince Harry has attended every edition of the tournament — until a crisis struck.

Just as was the case with each year, Prince Harry was delighted to officially announce the 2020 edition of the Invictus Games. But as excitement grew amongst athletes and fans alike, the COVID-19 pandemic brought proceedings to a crashing halt as countries went into full lockdown in order to curb the spread of the virus. But this would not be the end of the competition — not if Harry had anything to say about it, at least.

While the coronavirus pandemic led to the cancellation of plenty of public events, Prince Harry still did his part to instill hope in fans of the Invictus Games by promising that the event would return in 2022. And that resilience reminded Harry's admirers a lot of somebody else.

His mother. While many people regarded Diana as the people's princess, Harry simply knew her as "the best mum in the world." He emotionally recalled, "We felt incredibly loved, her and I." And though she was gone, Harry felt compelled to carry on her mission.

Just as Princess Diana looked to lift up those around her, Prince Harry did the same as he founded the Invictus Games. But while the competition may be viewed as his most famous philanthropic endeavor, Prince Harry's charitable works began many years before.

Just like his mother, Harry has dedicated himself to victims of HIV. In 2006, Prince Harry partnered with Prince Seeiso of Lesotho to form the nonprofit Sentebale, aimed at supporting young people in Southern Africa who are living with or affected by HIV/AIDS. But this wasn't the only way Harry shadowed his mother.

In 1997, Princess Diana walked through an active minefield in Angola — an act that many believed helped to raise awareness for an international treaty against landmines. In 2019, Prince Harry navigated the same path as his mother, continuing to deliver her message about the "vital mission of de-mining Angola." Even in everyday life, Prince Harry has emulated Diana.

Harry has even made sure to honor Diana through other subtle actions. On his and Meghan's wedding day, the bride walked down the aisle with a bouquet consisting of Forget-Me-Nots, Diana's favorite flower. If Harry's actions prove anything, it's that he has managed to turn his personal pain into positivity by improving the world around him. Even so, there is one rift in his life that would likely disappoint his late mother.

Diana's two sons meant the world to her, so she would undoubtedly be troubled by continuing rumors of the feud between them. There is a good chance that some news of their disagreements are exaggerated, of course. But the two brothers are moving in different directions, which has pushed them farther apart than ever.

And tales from William and Harry’s childhood imply that the two were, perhaps unintentionally, raised as an heir and a spare. In fact, according to royal biographer Ingrid Seward, the Queen Mother in particular favored William, knowing that one day he would be the future king. But Princess Diana apparently worked hard to ensure that Harry didn’t feel as though he was second best.

Tragically, though, in 1997 Diana suddenly died in a motor vehicle accident, and the two boys were left motherless. And the harrowing experience seemingly brought them together like nothing else could. In a 2017 clip which was published by Kensington Palace, William said, “We are uniquely bonded because of what we’ve been through. But even Harry and I over the years have not talked enough about our mother.”

As an adult, Harry revealed that the loss of Diana sent him into a mental health spiral. But he also mentioned that his brother had helped him to get through it. After a long period of forcing himself to feel nothing, Harry finally went to a therapist – after William helped to persuade him to get the assistance he needed, that is.

So when Harry married actress Meghan Markle in May 2018, William naturally was his best man. William’s two oldest children – George and Charlotte – served as a page boy and a bridesmaid, respectively. And the wedding itself appeared to be a joyous occasion. But in time rumors about the royals started to spark.

After the wedding, you see, Meghan became pregnant. And then it was announced that the newlyweds would be moving away from their home in the grounds of Kensington Palace, which is in close proximity to William and Kate’s family home. Instead, they would go and live Frogmore Cottage – a more spacious property, despite its name. But many rumors developed from there.

First, the media began reporting that Meghan and William’s wife, Kate, didn’t care for each other. In 2018 The Sun reported that a palace source said the two duchesses had fought about the royals’ staff, for instance. The insider reportedly claimed, “Meghan can be difficult. She has very high standards and is used to working in a Hollywood environment.”

And to make matters worse, it was reportedly claimed by a person who spoke to The Daily Telegraph that Meghan had made Kate cry before the royal wedding took place. According to the alleged insider, a fitting for Charlotte’s bridesmaid dress had become “stressful.” Eventually, Kate – who’d had her third child just weeks beforehand – apparently left the room openly crying.

But after these developments came a major twist in the tale. Journalist Katie Nicholl – who is the royal correspondent for Vanity Fair – suddenly came out with a revelation that concerned a brewing feud between two different royals: William and Harry. She even stated that a friend of both princes had been in contact with her about the origin of their quarrel.

According to Nicholl’s alleged source, “Harry felt William wasn’t rolling out the red carpet for Meghan and told him so. They had a bit of a fall out which was only resolved when Charles stepped in and asked William to make an effort.” And while both sets of royals were seen together in the wake of this alleged argument, it appeared that there were still undercurrents of ill-feeling between the brothers.

And 2019 brought with it yet more salacious stories centered around the two princes and their wives. In February, for instance, TLC released a documentary called Kate v. Meghan: Princesses at War? that Nicholls appeared in. She said, “William was quite concerned that the relationship [between Harry and Meghan] had moved so quickly.”

“And [as William is] close to Harry, [he was] probably the only person close enough to say to Harry, ‘This seems to be moving quickly, are you sure?’” Nicholls went on. “I think what was meant as well-intended brotherly advice just riled Harry. Harry is hugely protective of Meghan. He saw that as criticism. He interpreted that as his brother not really being behind this marriage, this union. And I don’t think things have been quite right ever since.”

But there was more salacious gossip in the documentary, too. According to Emily Andrews – the royal reporter for tabloid newspaper The Sun – Harry had an over-the-top reaction to William’s questioning. Yes, she claimed that the younger prince “went ballistic and said, ‘You’re trying to wreck this relationship before it’s even started.’”

And in 2019 filmmaker Nick Bullen spoke to Fox News about what he knew of the royals. He claimed that it had always been William and Harry feuding, but the media had played up the idea that it was Kate and Meghan. He said, “Let’s have these two super glamorous women – one British, one American. One an actress, one sort of an English rose. Let’s put them against each other… that’s the sexy sort of media story.”

“It’s actually William and Harry [that] have had a rift,” Bullen then claimed. “All brothers fall out. All families fall out. Their fallout at the moment is becoming public... I think people don’t want to think about that with these two boys.” The two princes are, after all, the only children of a beloved princess.

The filmmaker then said, “These are two boys who lost their mother at a really early age... [The] fairytale is that they are closer than ever and need each other. And I think that’s probably true. But equally, they are two grown men in their 30s, starting their own families, [they have] different wives – they are moving to different parts of the country [with] different duties.”

But in that same month, a man called Dickie Arbiter – one-time press secretary to Queen Elizabeth II herself – gave an interview to Us Weekly. And it seemed to contradict some of the rumors that have swirled around the two royals. Yes, he said the reported feud was “all based on Harry and Meghan moving out of Kensington Palace to move into Windsor.”

Arbiter went on, “Harry has decided that he wants to set up his own office, which is fair enough. While he was single, he was living in his comfort zone with his brother and his sister-in-law. But now he’s married, he’s creating his own comfort zone with his wife, and it just makes sense. You can’t have a small staff running the offices of two people. Harry is now moving on and setting up his own office. Nothing unusual in that.”

And on May 6, 2019, Harry became a father. Yes, he and Meghan welcomed their first child – a boy named Archie Harrison Mountbatten-Windsor – into the world. According to a statement released by the palace at the time, a number of the royals – including William and Kate – had “been informed and [were] delighted with the news.”

A couple of days after Archie was born, William and Kate attended the King’s Cup Regatta and were asked about little Archie. William stated that they were “obviously looking forward to seeing them in the next few days when things have quietened down.” And, more jokingly, he said, “I’m very pleased and glad to welcome my own brother into the sleep deprivation society that is parenting.”

And baby Archie appeared – according to the media at least – to assuage any grievances that the brothers had felt. In June 2019 Nicholl told Entertainment Tonight, “It’s absolutely the case that the brothers did fall out. I was told by a very senior royal source that actually they weren’t talking to each other at one point. I certainly think now that Archie is here, it has probably really helped to improve the relationship. William is over the moon that his brother is a dad.”

As for Kate and Meghan, apparently there was no bad blood between them whatsoever. Nicholls told Entertainment Tonight, “I hear that Kate has made herself available to Meghan if she needs advice, if she needs any help, and Kate said to her, ‘I’m here. I’m here for you.’” So there was no feud between the two women at all, it seems.

William and Kate attended Archie’s christening in July. But the month after that marked a sad occasion: the anniversary of Diana’s passing. The media reported that regardless of any past arguments, Harry and William would spend the day together to fondly remember their mother and all that she did for them.

Finally, in October Harry broke his silence about the apparent rift when journalist Tom Bradby interviewed the prince for the ITV documentary Harry and Meghan: An African Journey. And Bradby posed a difficult question to the prince, saying, “There’s been a lot of talk in the press about rifts with your brother – how much of that is true?”

Harry gave us an answer, replying, “Part of this role, part of this job, this family, being under the pressure which it’s under – inevitably stuff happens. But we are brothers. We will always be brothers. We are certainly on different paths at the moment, but I will always be there for him... as I know he will always be there for me.”

The prince went on, “We don’t see each other as much as we used to, as we are so busy. But I love him dearly, and you know the majority of the stuff is probably – well, the majority of the stuff is created out of nothing. But as brothers, you have good days, and you have bad days.”

Meghan was also interviewed for the documentary, and she indicated that she wasn’t dealing well with royal life. When the duchess was asked how she was handling the scrutiny, for instance, she answered, “In all honesty, I have said for a long time to H – that is what I call him – it’s not enough to just survive something. That’s not the point of life. You have got to thrive.”

And after the documentary had aired, William apparently wasn’t too happy about it. At first, rumors swirled that he had been angered by his brother’s words. But according to the BBC, an insider from Kensington Palace allegedly told the broadcasting corporation that William was actually feeling “worried.” The palace itself had no official response to the interview.

Yet an anonymous royal insider apparently told E! Online that there was “a lot of bemusement within the royal family about what exactly Harry and Meghan are trying to achieve... [As] members of the royal family do not usually speak in such detail about personal matters.” They went on, “It’s fair to say that there is a deep sense of unease in the royal households about the direction this is all headed.”

And Harry’s admissions in the documentary sparked waves of speculation online. At the beginning of November another source that was apparently close to the royals told Us Weekly, “There’s always been a part of Harry that felt like he was living in his brother’s shadow. He doesn’t envy the responsibility that comes with being the future king of England. But William’s the ‘golden boy,’ and Harry feels like he has a lot to live up to.”

Later in November People magazine quoted a source who reportedly said, “There is a lot of hurt, and a lot of unresolved issues between the boys and no one to help mediate… Petty grievances can become huge conflicts between all the different royal offices if they aren’t managed correctly – and that’s exactly what’s happening now.”

There were also rumors at this point that Prince Charles – Harry and William’s father – wasn’t helping matters. New Idea magazine reported, for instance, that “Charles speaks to Meghan most weeks to see how she’s doing, [but] he rarely picks up the phone to call Kate.” And this supposed preferential treatment was apparently “rubbing William up the wrong way.”

As Christmas drew closer, it transpired that Harry and Meghan would not be indulging in festivities with the rest of the royal family at Sandringham. Instead, they would be going to Los Angeles to see Meghan’s mom Doria Ragland, whom the actress is very close to. So was this all perfectly normal – or instead another sign of a royal feud?

Well, because royal Christmases are carefully scheduled and protocol-laden events, Harry actually had to ask the Queen for permission to go to the States first – and she agreed. The palace even issued a statement which referred to the matter. It read, “This decision is in line with precedent set previously by other members of the Royal Family and has the support of Her Majesty The Queen.”

Apparently, according to a source who spoke to Closer Weekly, William and Kate were “relieved.” But not for the reasons that one might presume. William wasn’t glad he wouldn’t have to see his brother at Christmas, you see, but rather happy that Harry and Meghan were having some time away from the public eye.

In December Victoria Arbiter – the daughter of Dickie and 9Honey’s royal correspondent – talked about how the royal children could potentially help heal any apparent feud. She said, “Royal cousins have long shared very special relationships. I think the Cambridges are going to want their children to know Archie really well – and for them to develop the lovely warm relationships that Harry and William have with their cousins.”

The younger Arbiter said that the two duchesses could actually help improve matters, too. She explained, “I think both Meghan and Kate, they are both girls that have a lot of good girlfriends – clearly girl relationships are important to them. They’re both nurturing, they’re caretakers [and] they’re warm people at their core.”

The royal expert went on, “And I would imagine, behind the scenes, both Meghan and Kate are sort of wanting to bash their husbands’ heads together and say, ‘Okay, let’s move past this now. Because we are such a force for good when we’re all working together.’ Kate and Meghan are probably trying to [instil] a little bit of common sense in the brothers – let’s put it that way.”

It remains to be seen where Harry and William’s relationship will go from here, though. Perhaps William will one day speak out about the matter in the same way that his brother did. But Harry’s words were far from condemnatory, and he made it clear that he loved his older sibling – no matter what. So hopefully no disagreement will truly be able to rip them apart.