Leaving your job can be a tough time, even if you’re moving on to better pastures. Indeed, you still have to say goodbye to colleagues – who you can hopefully call friends, by now – and leave behind an entire chapter of your life. Thankfully, there’s always cake to make the situation easier to swallow. Unless it’s one of these bitterly unforgiving masterpieces, that is.
Picture it. You head into work one day to find out that your friend’s leaving for a job at Bing. Well, there’s only one reasonable course of action for that traitor: get them a Google cake. The irony is quite literally delicious.
This is basically the most disarming cake we’ve ever seen. After the penguin, balloons and congratulatory message lull us into a false sense of security, the accusation of “traitor” hits completely out of the blue – like a high-speed train that suddenly comes screaming out of a tunnel. Truly, this is a savage farewell cake for the ages.
Straight to the point, no beating around the bush: that’s exactly how we like our cakes. And clearly, it’s exactly how the schemers behind this scathing cake like them, too. If you aren’t au fait with this particular acronym, however, we’ll have to point you in the direction of a search engine – as it’s far too rude to repeat.
There’s nothing like a sweet farewell to bid someone adieu and good luck in their next adventure in life. Alas, that notion seems to have bypassed this employee’s colleagues completely. We suppose the recipient can take some small comfort in the fact that at least their colleagues know they’re also going to hell – presumably for giving them this cake in the first place.
Poor Batman. The Caped Crusader just can’t catch a break. This stone-cold message really is both the literal and figurative icing on the cake when it comes to verbal smackdowns. Hopefully the employee saw the funny side, at least.
What a heartwarming message to give to a colleague departing for a new job. Indeed, we bet the recipient of this succinct cake will be totally ready to start their new role now, spurred on by the enthusiastic well-wishes of their pals. Totally.
Another cake we definitely wouldn’t want to eat. There’s just something incomparably unwholesome about having your food look like this. Sure, it might conceivably be delicious but that’s not the point. For the recipient, it’s a slap in the face. The savage pun is a bonus – but the spelling mistake isn’t.
Zero punches were pulled with this gruesome feat of baking excellence. Indeed, it’s like something straight out of a horror movie; we’re not sure whether to feel hungry or nauseous. Either way, we bet this employee felt truly special on their last day at the office.
As if the accusation of “quitter” wasn’t bad enough already, whoever was behind this nauseating specimen didn’t even go to the trouble of making an appetizing cake. Indeed, it’s adding insult to… well, insult. We probably wouldn’t even bother turning up for the leaving party if this was the standard.
We’re pretty sure that no matter how tasty this cake is, nobody’s ever going to find out – particularly the vet it was intended for. After all, could you really bring yourself to eat it? The message couldn’t be more at odds with the cake’s stomach-churning design, which just makes this one all the more brutal.
As this cake’s baker wrote on Instagram, it’s “a friendly farewell cake for a co-worker.” And really, it doesn’t get much friendlier than this. After all, what’s more amicable than rainbows, clouds, sprinkles and such a heart-warming message?
There’s no beating around the bush with this cake. Indeed, that emoji’s not fooling anybody; these guys clearly aren’t sad about their colleague leaving at all. Instead, they’ve moved straight past denial and sorrow into bitter anger.
We’re not sure what relevance Bugs Bunny has to this cake – perhaps a “What’s up, Doc?” reference? However, we guess that’s superfluous to the hilarious message emblazoned next to him. The professional world is a fast-moving beast, so don’t be surprised if you go back to an old job to discover that everyone’s forgotten your name.
They say honesty is the best policy in most situations. We can think of a couple where that might not apply, however. Take this savage cake, for instance: we’re pretty sure that’s not what its recipient wanted to hear. Too bad for them…
If you’re quitting your job, don’t expect to be able to play the sympathy card. Indeed, that’s reserved exclusively for people fired or made redundant in unceremonious circumstances. Everyone else? Well, they’ll just get cakes like this.
No icing necessary for this brutal, guilt trip-inducing cake. Cards Against Humanity is all you need to get the message across. And, of course, it’s made all the sweeter by how wonderfully accurate the card selection is. We’re definitely onto a winner here…
There’s nothing like a subtle insult to really make someone second-guess themselves. This hilarious graph, for instance, suggests that supply has outstripped demand for John. Indeed, he’s surplus to requirements. But hey, at least he got a cake out of it.
Whoever was behind this appetizing cake just couldn’t stick to their guns, apparently. But while that message along the bottom edge might betray their real feelings, the sulky teenage tantrum on top is still just as delicious as the cake presumably is.
Even just getting a promotion within the same company doesn’t necessarily shield you from the absolute savagery of a brutal cake message. Indeed, this meme-worthy dessert doesn’t waste any time in telling its recipient exactly what to do.
Remember Grumpy Cat? Well, someone here clearly does. And while this internet reference might be a little outdated, the message remains truly hilarious – thanks in part to the amazing finesse of the icing. A superbly ruthless work of art.